Find your tribe

Writing can be a lonely business, particularly when you’re writing into the wind and hoping for a publishing deal. I’ve now been an author in 4 different countries (Denmark, UK, UAE and Australia) and nothing about the isolated nature of writing changed between moves (except for the quality of the coffee). Until I discovered my writing tribe.

Now every second Wednesday, I meet up with three other local writers, drink tea (H has something complicated with almond, L has peppermint or camomile and N and I have peppermint), eat lashings of toast (how Enid Blyton of us) and pour out our thoughts in person and on the page. Full disclosure: we usually spend most of the meeting talking rather than writing, but it’s still the most productive part of my week. Because nobody gets what you’re going through like another writer.

Whether it’s wrestling with writer’s block, dealing with editorial decisions or just dishing the dirt on the publishing industry, the 90 minutes I spend with my fellow writers transforms my week. Recently when I received a bit of disappointing feedback, all three stepped in and offered help and cheer. As a consequence, my latest draft is being read by three crackshot writers, each with a different skillset.

Our different specialisms mean I’ve offered and received advice on synopses, medical issues, approachable agents and the correct number of biscuits to eat while writing (answer – limitless). My writing companions are all different ages, from different places and write different genres but what they have in common is a generosity of spirit (and a commitment to comestibles. Finding my tribe truly has been a transformative experience.

Finding yours doesn’t have to be in the form of a Wednesday morning group – one thing that’s amazed me about the publishing world is how friendly most people are. You might find you hit it off with someone you bat DMs back and forward with on Twitter (I’ve met someone lovely this way) or you might click with someone you meet on a writing course (again, tick! I have a lovely friend I met on a one-day editing course). Friendships can be virtual as well as physical. I’m part of an amazingly amusing writers What’sApp group, a super helpful Facebook group and a group whose meetings I can usually never meet but who have become vital allies independently.

So if you do one thing today, reach out to another author. They might not become a best buddy instantly but I guarantee that they’ll get what you’re going through. And even if it turns out to be nothing more than trading the odd Instagram like, it’s a start. From the smallest acorns the mightiest oaks grow. At least that’s what my writing friends tell me.